I’ve assumed the position, for about 2 weeks now, and I face the paddle everywhere I turn.
WARNING: I am about to whine and vent and complain.
Oh, it’s my own fault mostly. You know the routine, where you try to jam too much into a day, every day, for weeks. You crash and you burn.
I know you don’t want me to get started on it again, but the situation with my eyes is making me completely psychotic.
One of my limitations is that I have expectations that are too high for the world. When am I moments away from being lasered in the eyeballs, and find the process suddenly interrupted by cops demanding the medical building is evacuated, my expectation is that I will be involved in some sort of contingency plan within the next day or so.
One week later. I wait.
It’s making me think of The Rules book on dating, and specifically this one.
If he does not call he is not that interested. Period.
Meanwhile, like an eager puppy I am calling, begging for a sign of commitment from the laser center I am courting. But seriously, I really question what kind of medical practice doesn’t have a plan, doesn’t call patients, one week later!?
It’s not just the eyes. I’m maxed out. The background is that I haven’t gotten a good night’s sleep in 5 years. No really. When you have twins, no one is knocking down your door to take them for a night. No one is encouraging you to get away and not worry. Then when you your twins are 18 months old and you have another baby, it’s a ghost town. I get it. It’s 3 babies! That’s a lot to take on.
Okay I lied. I did go to my friend’s wedding 3 years ago and my generous sister stayed overnight and took care of them while we were away. She needed about 5 days to recoup after those 24 hours. And I spent the time missing them terribly!
So when you are sleep deprived, when you are not the best coper to begin with, when there’s little fuel in the tank, things are harder to manage. I get it.
I have to get back to cupcake baking now. I’m due at the twins’ classes this morning @10:30 for the in class birthday parties. I will be reading 2 of their favorite stories in each class and providing cupcakes. Did I mention I have NO VOICE!? Well, I do have some squeak, so I guess that will do.
Have a good one, and if you see me around, better to steer clear for a while…
P.S. I may have to delete this post when I come to my senses.