Archive | November, 2010

Thank You Sir, May I Have Another?

30 Nov

I’ve assumed the position, for about 2 weeks now, and I face the paddle everywhere I turn.

WARNING: I am about to whine and vent and complain.

Oh, it’s my own fault mostly.  You know the routine, where you try to jam too much into a day, every day, for weeks.  You crash and you burn.

I know you don’t want me to get started on it again, but the situation with my eyes is making me completely psychotic.

One of my limitations is that I have expectations that are too high for the world.  When am I moments away from being lasered in the eyeballs, and find the process suddenly interrupted by cops demanding the medical building is evacuated, my expectation is that I will be involved in some sort of contingency plan within the next day or so.

One week later.  I wait.

It’s making me think of The Rules book on dating, and specifically this one.

If he does not call he is not that interested. Period.

Meanwhile, like an eager puppy I am calling, begging for a sign of commitment from the laser center I am courting.  But seriously, I really question what kind of medical practice doesn’t have a plan, doesn’t call patients, one week later!?

It’s not just the eyes.  I’m maxed out.  The background is that I haven’t gotten a good night’s sleep in 5 years.  No really.  When you have twins, no one is knocking down your door to take them for a night.  No one is encouraging you to get away and not worry.  Then when you your twins are 18 months old and you have another baby, it’s a ghost town.  I get it.  It’s 3 babies! That’s a lot to take on.

Okay I lied.  I did go to my friend’s wedding 3 years ago and my generous sister stayed overnight and took care of them while we were away.  She needed about 5 days to recoup after those 24 hours.  And I spent the time missing them terribly!

So when you are sleep deprived, when you are not the best coper to begin with, when there’s little fuel in the tank, things are harder to manage.  I get it.

I have to get back to cupcake baking now.  I’m due at the twins’ classes this morning @10:30 for the in class birthday parties.  I will be reading 2 of their favorite stories in each class and providing cupcakes.  Did I mention I have NO VOICE!?  Well, I do have some squeak, so I guess that will do.

Have a good one, and if you see me around, better to steer clear for a while…

P.S.  I may have to delete this post when I come to my senses.

Fall at the Beach

27 Nov

It’s been freezing here post Thanksgiving, but a couple of weeks back we had unusually mild weather for November in New York.  The sun was shining so we thought about doing something different.

I grew up in New Jersey.  To get to “the shore” we had to drive at least 2 hours.  The beaches are beautiful but the ride and the traffic not so great.  What I love about where I live now is that there are beautiful beaches within 20 minutes of our house.

So, we decided to take a November stroll on the beach.

I was freezing (it was probably around 59 or 60 degrees and windy), but the kids…I can’t even describe how much they were squealing with absolute delight.

A few people walked by and their faces lit up as it seemed the joy was contagious.  The kids would have completely submerged themselves had we allowed them.  As it was they were drenched and at one point were running around in underpants.  (and yes you know I took photos of that….but I’ll spare you!)

It brought into focus how simple things can bring such delight to an otherwise ordinary day.

You ever do a relaxation excercise and you’re told to visualize a favorite place?  This is what I see.

Dump Cake (And My Eyes)

24 Nov

Well now that I’m not recovering from laser surgery, I guess there’s no real excuse for an inadequate Thanksgiving feast!  I want to tell you what I am preparing today but first a quick update on the canceled surgery.

I called the office this morning at 10:30 and the standard “call back during office hours” message came on.  I held on for the answering service.  The operator told me patients have been arriving at the building to find it shut down and surrounded by police and so far the doctor hasn’t paged her back.

Look, I tend to be one to jump too quickly to judgment and conclusion…but seriously?  I mean I feel irritated that I’m in limbo, but not even today’s patients were reached?   SO, there’s no outgoing message with this important information, nor has the answering service been informed and the doctor is MIA.  Okay…..anyway feel free to call me on it if I am being unfair here, but wow, not good practice and I am feeling uneasy all around.  Oh and it’s mid afternoon and I still haven’t heard from the practice.

Okay I’m done with that…for now!

Today I will be making Blue Cranberry Sauce, Dump Cake, Mashed Potatoes and probably Bread Pudding.  I want to focus on the Dump Cake here…..

SO what’s Dump Cake you ask?  Why, just the easiest cake you’ll ever prepare!  Actually, I’m not a fruity pie/cake person so it’s really not for me, but that’s just great.  I looooove making high calorie deserts that won’t even tempt me!  This is my first time making it, so here we go.

Dump Cake

The ingredients are easy and the recipe is great for kid involvement.

1 box yellow cake mix
2 cans cherry pie filling
1 16 oz. can crushed, drained pineapple
2 sticks butter, melted

Grease the bottom of a 13×9 dish and dump the contents of the pie filling and pineapple–don’t forget to drain the pineapple like I did!   Mix gently– I think I mixed a little too much.

Pour the dry unmixed cake mix on top. Drizzle the 2 sticks of butter evenly on top of the cake mix.

My directions say to bake according to the cake box directions, however I found I needed to bake for 1 hour.


Only Me — Laser Surgery Update

23 Nov

So there I was today, all set to be lasered.  They had just given me meds.  I was excited to be done with one week of glasses wearing.  Then the assistant came and said,

Okay your surgery will not be happening.  There’s structural damage to the building and we need to evacuate immediately.  I have no other information.  The cops are in the waiting room waiting for us to leave.

I’m so frustrated.  The parking garage has been under construction and apparently a beam was hit.  The building is structurally unsound……..I heard someone say there was the potential it could collapse at any moment!

My husband said thank god the procedure hadn’t already started.

It may not seem like a big deal but I’m so disappointed.  There’s been so much prepping for this moment. My immediate response to situations like this is anger…….how do I get over that?

Thankful for My Son’s Wonderful Teacher

22 Nov

My son had his Thanksgiving party today at school and parents were invited to see their ‘show’.  I tell you every time I set foot in that school there’s a point at which I become choked up.  His teacher is just so incredible and what I continue to hear from her over and over is that we, the parents, need to stop, appreciate and enjoy these special, incredible moments with our incredible children. This is an excerpt from her most recent weekly letter.

On this Thanksgiving, I would like to share a pointer with you. A couple of years ago, there was a study to determine what caused children to get high scores on the SAT’s (Scholastic Aptitude Tests). “IQ, social circumstances, and economic status all seemed less important that another subtler factor. Youngsters who had the highest SAT scores all regularly had dinner with their parents”. This is from Dr. Lucy Calkins’ book “Raising Lifelong Learners: A Parent’s Guide”. I realize that this is impossible for some families but try to do it as often as possible.
Of course this doesn’t mean that we can guarantee shared conversation at the dinner table, but let us make a conscious effort on this Thanksgiving to share our talk with the children. Listening and taking turns will also be learned at the dinner table. Car rides are another place where children can share in adult talk. Shut off the cell phones.
Children cannot read, understand or write what they cannot say.
“Keep up the good work!!” Never stop talking to your children. They love to know exactly what you are doing and why. Please share some stories with your children this Thanksgiving.
Your wonderful children are truly my reason to be thankful this year. I wish you all a conversation filled, healthy and happy Thanksgiving.

Doesn’t she sound great?

The show was so adorable; my son was an Indian.

That’s him, right there, the only one not looking or standing where he’s supposed to be :)

Boy did I feel sorry for the bedraggled parents I saw from other classes carrying in turkeys. And, my daughter didn’t understand why I was only attending my son’s party; parents weren’t invited to hers.

Are school Thanksgiving parties with parents the norm?

Thanksgiving Prep…Blue Cranberry Sauce

21 Nov

Okay.  Now that I got over my twins’ birthday celebration, I can focus on Thanksgiving.

Did I mention I am hosting, and I have done zero so far in the way of prepping?  Oh yes that’s right, I’m also have laser eye surgery in 3 days!

But it’s okay because I’m going to try to keep it fairly simple.

Though I dislike cranberry sauce, I usually make it because my nephew is a big fan of my cranberry sauce.  What makes it unique is that it is made with blueberries!  Even the canned sauce lovers go crazy for it.  I make it the night or so before so it’s not a big drag.

Blue Cranberry Sauce
1 (12 ounce) package fresh cranberries
1 cup water
1/2 cup white sugar    (I add an extra 1/4 cup)
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/8 teaspoon ground allspice
1 pint fresh blueberries

1    Wash and pick over cranberries. Place in a medium saucepan with water, and sugar. Bring to a boil, reduce heat, stir and simmer for 10 minutes or until cranberries burst.
2    Slightly mash the cranberries with the back of a wooden spoon to insure all skins are broken. Add the cinnamon, nutmeg and allspice. Mix well.
3    Remove from heat and mix in the blueberries when the sauce has cooled a bit (don’t be afraid to break a few, but don’t over mash either). The sauce will thicken as it cools.
4    Transfer to a bowl and place plastic wrap directly on top of sauce to cover. Refrigerate until chilled.

What are your coveted Thanksgiving recipes?


My 5 Pounders Turn 5

20 Nov

This weekend my twins will be turning 5 years old.  I can hardly fathom that 5 years have passed.

It was Thanksgiving Day in 2005 when we took brought them home from the hospital.  When we walked in our home I stared at them in their car seats, wondering how to proceed.  Their tiny bodies (my girl was under 5 lbs when she came home)  could hardly be found under the layers of clothing and blankets.

Our family had doubled in size and I was terrified.

The days and nights blurred.  Get up.  Feed Twin A.  Burp Twin A.  Change Twin A.  Swaddle and put him back to bed.  Feed Twin B (and she was so tiny it sometimes took almost an hour).  Burp Twin B.  Pump my milk.  Wash and prepare the next bottles.  Then I would get about 30 minutes to sleep until the process would begin again.  I never thought those days would end and I cannot remember when they did.

Those little chicks are now little people…….growing too fast!

Twins are awesome. I love how my big guy protects his sisters.  I love that my big girl is who the others go to when they need a hug.

I just asked them if they wanted to take pictures as 5 year olds.

They didn’t even consider posing separately :)

Give your kids a smooch today and have a lovely weekend.

The Female Parent

18 Nov

“I think my life began with waking up and loving my mother’s face.”
— George Eliot

I am often the subject of my twins’ artwork.

Even my boy is really getting into drawing.

Mom your hair is YELLOW!!!

And the little one…she strokes my face and likes to take a clump of my hair to use it to stroke her own face.

The love for mother…I don’t even think we are conscious of how powerful it is!

As Thanksgiving approaches…I am grateful to both give and receive it.

What are you grateful for?

Fresh Pressed Frenzy

17 Nov

I tentatively started this blog 6 months ago after my famous blogger friend Vera gave me a big shove.  I wasn’t clear on what I hoped to achieve, but my hope was that at the very least I would have a place to keep track of all moments I don’t  want to forget pertaining to the kids, like, when my daughter declared loudly in the Stop n Shop the other night,

Moooooooooom, I keep farting from my mouf.

I obsess about every aspect and detail and every time I hit that PUBLISH button I feel a little sick.  In real life, I prefer to be in the background and a blog really contradicts that.

The other thing is that I’m not that literary.  My writing skills are not extraordinary.  But I love to record experiences…too much actually so that I have difficulty being in the moment.

So where I am going with this morning’s rambling?  For the past week or so, I thought about shutting this thing down.  I’m tired.  It’s a time suck.  And again I couldn’t be clear on the why of it.  So I obsessed and obsessed.  And then I sat down for 5 minutes yesterday to update about my upcoming laser surgery.  I continued on in my blurry headachey haze.

Then something funny happened.

My Blackberry became possessed with WordPress emails indicating I had comments awaiting approval…comments from people I didn’t know.  I was being congratulated about being ‘freshly pressed’.  I experienced my normal reaction of anxiety……did I somehow publish that post somewhere else?  What was happening?  What did I do wrong?  (yes sadly that is really how I process things).

I went to investigate.  And then I saw this:

That’s the WordPress homepage.  Right there on the bottom row is my post from yesterday.  And this is what it all means:

Freshly Pressed: The best of 365,361 bloggers, 511,339 new posts, 389,672 comments, & 105,882,420 words today on

Um what?! I feel like I got into the National Honor’s Society or something.  And now all these fabulous bloggers from around the world are reading my little blog and sending me all sorts of well wishes!

I’m feeling the love, and it couldn’t have come at a better time.   Now I have to go take an Advil and clean my glasses :)

An Affair to Remember

16 Nov

I’ve said good-bye to my constant companions for the past 27 years.  Not a day went by without them, and over the years I spent a lot of money on their maintenance and care.  They were essential to my functioning, in fact, I couldn’t even get out of bed without them…….

My contact lenses….they’ve all been tossed in the garbage.  And exactly one week from today I will say goodbye to their partner, my glasses, in the same fashion.

Hello laser, we have a date very soon!

It’s intriguing to me because how many surgeries are there where the individual looks forward to it excitedly and feels free to tell everyone in sight.  It’s not like you hear people saying, hey guess what I’m having my gallbladder removed next week…can’t wait!  Yeah there are enhancement surgeries but do people really converse about the upcoming tummy tuck?

For those of you who are familiar with corrective laser eye surgery, I will be having PRK, not LASIK.  If you are interested in learning about the differences, click here.

My first challenge will be to get through this week donning glasses (contact removal a week prior to the procedure is a requirement).  Contact wearers you know how it is trying to wear your glasses full-time.  Aside from how superficially displeased I am with how I look in them, in addition to many unpleasant memories of being a “4 eyed” kid, my vision is so much less in them than in contacts.

But I’m really trying to experience every moment of my last week of visual impairment with appreciation.  I’m thankful that I have a wonderful option ahead…an option that will be become reality Thanksgiving week!

Have any of you experienced LASIK or PRK?


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